Facebook: I Love You, I Hate You

More and more I hear this: “I hate Facebook.” 

I can’t even tell you how many times this month alone my friends and professional contacts have told me they wish Facebook would go away. Some tell me they are thinking of closing their accounts.


It’s a love hate situation for me.

I do enjoy seeing what my friends and colleagues are up to and I do like that one topic can create a conversation thread. I like being able to share information. I love being able to interact with supporters who have become acquaintances/friends. I love that some of my family from around the country are on Facebook so we can easily keep in touch. I like that it’s a free service.

However, the constant updates drive me nuts. I hate that you have to go into your privacy settings and update your preferences over and over. I hate that you can no longer turn off the chat for good. You have to close it every time you log in. I hate the game requests. I dislike the 5,000 friend limit which forces you to create a fan page (which means you now have to operate two pages), I don’t really like the new bubble faces on my phone when people send me a private message, I hate all the junk on the left column. I don’t like the racy pictures and political rants. Sometimes I feel like I know “too much” about someone’s personal life from their posts.

I don’t know. If Facebook went away, would we miss it? Probably. A few of my friends have signed off permanently and they say they do NOT miss it. It depends what you use it for, I think.

It does cause issues.

People can find you, look at your posts and pictures… someone that you may not want prying into your life. I know, change the privacy settings, you say! Well, it’s not that easy. The updates changes your settings so often that it’s hard to keep up!! Sometimes you don’t even realize it.

I’ve heard some people say they have “drop friend” guilt. They want to drop someone because their posts annoy them or they are too frequent, but they feel guilty. Will they know? Can they tell? Will they be mad at me? It does become quite the dilemma!

Oh and I’m not really a fan of the fact that every move you make shows up in the “feed.” This posed a problem for my close friend. She has a disease and was trying to find more information about it. She found a few groups on Facebook. Well, little did she know if she posted a question or interacted with the group, it would show up in the feed for all Facebook friends to see.

How do you turn it off? You don’t. Ugh.

It’s a great tool, don’t get me wrong. It’s extremely helpful in my professional life. It is also, like I said, a nice way to keep connected with family and friends. I love seeing my cousin post pictures of her family and my Uncle. I find it useful to learn about struggles too. I was able to keep in touch with all my New Jersey family during the bad storms and get updates on how everyone was doing. Things like that.

For professional reasons, it’s a must.

I need it. Some don’t.

Do you LOVE or HATE? Do you know anyone who dropped it all together?

4 thoughts on “Facebook: I Love You, I Hate You

  1. As for the friends feed, I know exactly what you mean. But there is a way to turn off the constant news feed without deleting friends, you go to their main page, and where it says friend click on it, it gives you options to show in news feed, get notifications, etc, click the check mark next to show in news feed, and viola, they are still friends but you get to choose without them knowing what you want to see from them 🙂 I had a lot of friends that posted dumb unnecessary stuff that got old, and I found that option and it kept the friendships, and I can go see what is going on with my friends when I want too.

  2. I just retweeted someone (I think last week) lamenting about Facebook as I have been feeling quite the same lately.

    I was recently at a networking meeting where the leader was talking about how it now costs money to promote your business on Facebook and how we should support each other and share each others’ posts to our friends. I sat there thinking (disclaimer: bad business on my part, I know), “Seriously? This is one of the things I’ve been hating about Facebook.” I accept friend requests from people who are in my network of business acquaintances and now I see their posts about their businesses (and their families) instead of posts about my friends and family. Since people are sharing/sharing/sharing, Facebook deems those posts more important than the quaint post someone I know and love in another place posted about their life. Business is enmeshed with personal; it’s quite the quandary.

    My next Facebook pet peeve: My friends who post the memes and funny e-cards. Some friends are incessant about it, so much so I’ve had to hide them or their pictures. It’s like when a kid does something funny, gets a raucous laugh from the crowd, does it again, gets a laugh, and then keeps doing it until it’s no longer funny. I called out my best friend about it. She posts it, then her sister posts it, then her aunts and cousins post it. She posts so many that Facebook restricted her for a day (admittedly I was amused and shared so on her announcement). Best friend since childhood…won’t see her family pic updates anymore without creeping her page.

    Oh the politics, I’ve only had to hide one or two people for that. I like to follow politics, I’m a bit of a junkie and I don’t mind a differing opinion, but the political memes that are so outrageous…yeah, over and over and over, and then the opinions that are not in the least fact-checked. I’ll just stop right there.

    I guess my final complaint, which I already touched on above, is how Facebook decides what’s important to me. I don’t like that. I liked it when I could choose to view the stuff with the most likes, comments, etc. in one tab, or a nice, neat newsfeed that was organized by date/time in another tab. I miss those days.

    Facebook must be doing something right though. I still check in several times a day hoping not to miss those posts that might be important…not according to Facebook…but to me, the folks I hold near and dear who didn’t get lost amongst the muck since my last check in.

    Thanks for the asking so I could rant. Anyone have any suggestions on the business/personal enmeshment quandary?

  3. Yes Dayna. ir sure is a love/hate relationship/ I just read the previous comments and also agree with both women. I’ve have been forced to “unfriend” several people that just post useless junk all day long! They must sit at their computer for 23 hours a day! I agree the constant updates drive me nuts. I too hate that you have to go into your privacy settings and update your preferences over and over. You CAN however disconnect the chat entirely. Go to the control panel in Windows, select add-remove programs and wait for list to appear. Look for a program that you did not install called “Facebook messenger” click on it to delete it and follow any other directions that appear. Be careful but you can also delete other useless stuff here that you didn’t even know was installed if it bothers you.

  4. You know I dropped it over a year ago and don’t miss it a bit. I am tendon much more toward privacy lately. Love you dayna. Another great blog!!!

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